He Ain't Heavy, He's My Brother



 "And see that all these things are done in wisdom and order;

 for it is not requisite that a man should run faster than he has strength.

And again, it is expedient that he should be diligent,

that thereby he might win the prize;

therefore, all things must be done in order.

Mosiah 4:27



He Ain't Heavy, He's My Brother (sung by Neil Diamond)

http://youtu.be/usZtSl8mX08

    I am currently at home recuperating from my recent aforementioned knee/leg surgery. The procedure was done about 11 days ago at our community hospital. I had to have some repair work done to the meniscus in my right knee, and I also had to have a walnut-sized cyst removed from the top of my tibia bone and filled in with some cadaver bone. The procedure went well, except for the fact that I react adversely to Demerol. Demerol is usually injected into individuals who are coming out of anesthesia to prevent the shakes, which can and does happen due to the shock to your body that has just undergone major surgery. Yes, I did wake up to a bad case of the shakes in the recovery room. The nurses surrounded me with heated blankets from head to toe and with that with a combination of other drugs, I was able to recover quite well.

   My husband has been by my side faithfully during my surgery and over this recovery period. He has been so kind to take care of me and literally wait on me hand and foot, as there is little one can do with two crutches in one's hand and a lame leg. I am so thankful for him and his loving kindness to me over these past few days. He has not complained or lost patience with me once, which I find to be truly amazing! He has served me with love and devotion, and words seem inadequate to express my deep level of love and appreciation for him and all that he has done to take care of me and see that my needs are met.

    Throughout all of this I have been thinking quite a bit about my mother and her lifetime of health challenges.  My mother suffered from a Rheumatic heart condition and endured 5 open-heart surgeries over her lifetime. Her first heart surgery was to install a pacemaker in her heart. I was three years old at the time and really don't remember any of the details of the event except that fact that I was left to spend what felt like endless days at my friend and neighbor's house across the street. My two siblings had been flown off to stay with an aunt and uncle, but my parents felt that I was too young to be sent that far away. It was originally intended that I would spend the time staying at a local day care center run by a woman in our church, but that was very short lived as I would not be comforted and cried most of my time I was there. The next alternative was to send me across the street to stay with my friend and neighbor. I would play at their house on a frequent basis, and I felt much more comfortable staying there with them. I can still remember standing in their living room looking out the large picture windows that connected the corner of their house, anxiously waiting for my father's car to turn the corner and drive into our driveway across the street.

     Four more open-heart operations were performed on my mother, some were valve replacement procedures and others were for repair work on what was already in place in her heart. I cannot imagine the depth of fear and anguish she must have felt before each one of her surgeries. I can only remember her getting emotional before one of her surgeries, her last one. She had endured so very much and wasn't sure she would be able to endure another one. Thankfully, after that one she never had to. I was blessed and privileged to be living or visiting home when each of these surgeries was performed. I can remember one of her surgeries was done while I was taking a test in one of my business classes when I attended Weber State College. The professor was quite amazed when she found out what was going on with my mother and I was present in class that day.

    Another of her surgeries took place just after the Christmas holidays. We were able to be home for that Christmas holiday and when I found out that she needed the surgery I was able to extend my stay in order to be able to care for my father and for her when she returned home. I was very thankful to be able to be there and grateful that I could at least do something to help out during that difficult time for my parents. During   the last surgery my mother suffered a slight stroke and lost some of her long term memory. It was because of this that I was able to write down some of my childhood memories for her prior to her death. That was a wonderful experience for me to be able to reminisce and to share those memories with her, and to finally thank her for always being so supportive of me and for being such a good example to me.

   My mother was a very brave woman. She suffered much over her lifetime and rarely complained. I can only imagine the fear and frustrations she must have felt due to the limitations this condition had on her life. My mother never felt sorry for herself, and she never let those limitations keep her from living a full and productive life. I have learned so much from her example of courage, patience, endurance and embracing what really matters most in life. I have learned how to live by watching her live. By remembering how she endured her suffering, I am better able to endure mine without complaint and discouragement. She had such a deep and abiding faith and trust in God's plan for her and for her life. So much so that I think she knew ahead of her passing that her time was short. As a result she prepared by pre-planning her own funeral arrangements. Needless to say, this was a great blessing to us during a difficult time.

      I have not suffered nearly as much as my mother did over her lifetime, but this past few days has put me to the test. It has not been easy and I am not a very patient person. I have been so blessed to have so much help, and by so many that have taken time out of their busy lives to prepare a meal for us, send or bring me flowers, chocolates, videos and books. I have had many caring phone calls, cards and visits that have helped me endure this difficult and trying time in my life. I am deeply appreciative of these blessings that have come from others - brothers and sisters - who have been willing to "carry me" through this challenging time. Thank you. Thank you for making me feel loved. Thank you for being willing to help carry my burden. Thank you for helping me through. You are loved.

Because You Loved Me (Celine Dion)

http://youtu.be/ih1945e4q7I

The Light Has Come



"In the darkness even one small candle burns like the sun!"

-Roger Hoffman

He'll Carry You (Hilary Weeks)
http://youtu.be/HCVT88Dz_CM

"The message of this moment is so clear,
And as certain as the rising of the sun:
When your world is filled with darkness, doubt, or fear,
Just hold on, hold on,
The light will come."

     I have had some interesting experiences over the past week. Without going into too much detail I will just say that some of the challenging situations that I have been living through have finally ended, or will be ending soon. I have felt like I have been living in a long, dark night and looking for that "one small candle" for what feels like a very long time. I have felt "darkness, doubt and fear". It seems to be that way when we are going through some dark and stormy time periods in our life. It may begin with the death of a loved one, the loss of or change in a relationship, the loss of a job, suffering with an illness or having to live through what feels like an impossible situation. These times can bring the darkness into our lives for what feels like an eternity. But I'm here to tell you, that it does not last forever!

    Over the past few years I have wondered if it was me, if I was the only one that had these feelings of doubt and fear. I have felt at times like I was doing something wrong and God was punishing me. I felt alone and misunderstood, like no one could possibly understand what I was going through. These times have caused me to have some very deep "soul searching" sessions. I have held my thoughts, attitudes and behaviors up in the mirror and I haven't always liked what I have seen. I have struggled (and am still struggling) to make adjustments in my thought patterns, manage my emotions and my attitudes. But, I have "shown up", "been present" and "put forth my best effort", and God has made up the difference.

    I think that is what we have to do sometimes, "never, never, never give up" (thank you Winston Churchill). Some days it has been all I could do to drag myself out of bed and get through the day. Some days I have cried through most of it. I have poured out my soul in prayer, because I knew that God knew what I was going through. I have written my feelings in my journal because I just had to get them out. I knew I couldn't get through it on my own strength, mainly because I didn't have anymore strength on which to draw. I know that God knows my pain, He knows my fears, He knows my tears because I have certainly put them in front of Him many times. I know that He understands because He has suffered what I am suffering. I know I can trust him with my most intimate thoughts, even when I know that they might not please Him. I know that He loves me unconditionally. He will love me through my pain, anger and frustrations and in spite of my less than lofty thoughts and feelings.  How do I know this? Because over this past week, "the light has come", finally. The changes are happening within and without. I am feeling more hopeful, more at peace than I have felt in a very, very long time. The long, dark night is ending and the day dawn is breaking!

  Now this doesn't mean that all of my challenges and problems are going away. Heaven's no! In fact, my long awaited knee surgery is in two days, and I am feeling anxious about it. But, I also have recently been infused with the knowledge, wisdom and the hope that all of these things will be for my good, somehow, and that I can trust that God has a plan and a purpose in all of this for me. I have learned that sometimes you really do just have to "hold on" to what you know is true and right, put in your best effort and eventually, the light does come. . . . And when it comes, it is brilliant and nothing short of a miracle!

"If you feel trapped inside a never ending night,
If you've forgotten how it feels to feel the light,
If you're half crazy thinking you're the only one
who's afraid the light will never really come -
Just hold on, hold one the light will come."

(Michael McLean)
    
Hold On, The Light Will Come
(written by Michael McLean, sung by Jessie Clark Funk)

http://youtu.be/0OvPN1vtZos

Lead, Kindly Light



"Sometimes God calms the storm.

Sometimes He lets the storm rage and calms His child."

When You Come Back to Me Again (Originally by Garth Brooks, this version is a cover, but the video presentation is great)
http://youtu.be/781uZVEPFUo

        "A lighthouse is an ensign on a hill, shining its light across the raging seas, beaconing the wayward sailor to safe waters and warning of the rocky dangers that threaten to dash their ships to pieces and relinquish them to the murky depths of the ocean.  They represent what I wanted to be, a lighthouse standing like an island in the midst of raging storms, beaming hope to those who may be lost.
            Lighthouses are unique.  No two have the same stripes, and lenses are specifically cut for that lighthouse.  A lens from a lighthouse in California would not fit one from Oregon or Virginia.  They are each different with their own character and history.  The number of cuts on the lens determines the ability for their light to pierce through the misty darkness, reaching ships farther from the shore.  In like manner, the cuts we sustain through our trials, if accepted without complaint, allow us that ability to shine more brilliantly and reach the hearts of those around us who may be struggling." (Excerpt from A True Story, Mother Had a Secret, Learning to Love My Mother & Her Multiple Personalities by Tiffany Fletcher)

      I received the above quote from a dear friend this past week. She is very much aware of the trials and struggles I have experienced over the past few years, and has been a listening ear and a great support to me through them. She mentioned that as she read this passage in the book she couldn't help but think of me and wanted to pass it along to me. I am grateful for her thoughtfulness. I cannot, however, say that I have accepted every trial without complaint. But, I do have lots of "cuts" that I hope will make my inner light "shine more brilliantly and reach the hearts of those around [me] who may be struggling."

     I happen to live in a small tourist town on the shores of Lake Michigan, and we have a lighthouse in the harbor not too far from our home. There have been many times when I have felt lonely and in need of comfort as I have walked along the pier or along the beach and looked out past the lighthouse to the water. As I watch the waves come in and go out, their rhythm seems to sooth my weary soul and I am comforted.

    There have been times over the last few years of my life when I have felt like I was in the midst of a storm at sea and the waves keep coming - wave after wave after wave - and I have barely had enough time to come up for air! It has been a time of confusion and fear, frustration and isolation. I have felt at times like no one understands what I am experiencing, let alone knows what to do to help me!

    But I have found that there is One who does understand what I have been going through, and that is my loving Heavenly Father. He has been my "lighthouse" through my stormy seas. I have held on tightly to my faith in Him and his son, Jesus Christ - the "rock". They have been the "life preservers" that have kept me afloat through the midst of these storms. I honestly do not think that I would have survived without their constant loving support and guidance. Prayer and scripture reading are the materials that make up the "life preserver" to which I have clung. Admittedly, I have at times prayed more out of habit than sincere desire, but at other times I have poured out my heart and soul to God through my prayers. Seeking guidance, peace and healing through my communications with Him. I know in whom I can trust and to whom I can look to receive much needed guidance and solace.

    I attended a large university for my freshmen year of college. I often felt homesick, alone and invisible as I would walk amid the masses of people across the campus. Often I would look up at the huge mountains in the distance and wonder, "What am I doing here"? One day as I was walking across the campus I saw an old friend, a Seminary teacher from my high school days. He inquired as to how I was adjusting to college life and I shared with him my feelings of homesickness and loneliness. Through the course of our conversation he suggested that I go home and read the words to the hymn, "Lead, Kindly Light", and it would bring me some comfort. I took his advice and I did that. This experience brought me peace and understanding of the love that my Heavenly Father had for me at a time when I needed it the most. That hymn has had a special place in my heart ever since that day, so much so that I decided to use it as the opening hymn at my father's funeral. It continues to bring me peace and comfort.

Lead, kindly Light, amid th’encircling gloom;
Lead thou me on!
The night is dark, and I am far from home;
Lead thou me on!
Keep thou my feet; I do not ask to see
The distant scene—one step enough for me.

I was not ever thus, nor pray’d that thou
Shouldst lead me on.
I loved to choose and see my path; but now,
Lead thou me on!
I loved the garish day, and, spite of fears,
Pride ruled my will. Remember not past years.

So long thy pow’r hath blest me, sure it still
Will lead me on
O’er moor and fen, o’er crag and torrent, till
The night is gone.
And with the morn those angel faces smile,
Which I have loved long since, and lost awhile!

Text: John Henry Newman, 1801–1890

Music: John B. Dykes, 1823–1876

     As I continue along this life journey facing yet another trial in the near future, I know to whom I can look to help guide me through this "storm of life". The same being to whom I have always turned when I needed a helping hand to lift me up out of the "storms of life", my loving Father in Heaven. "If God has led you to it, He will lead you through it". So, lead, kindly light.

“Light – more light!”

 – Last words of Wolfgang Amadeus Mozart

Like a Lighthouse (performed by Drew Reese, written by Michael Webb)

http://youtu.be/p4EqYZKbWSE

(Dedicated to my dear friends, Maren and Kim B. Thank you, and may God lead you through the storms of life, as He has led me. I love you!)

Simple Things, Great Gifts



“Think of what a better world it would be if we had cookies and milk about three o’clock every afternoon, and then lay down on our blankets for a nap.”

 – Barbara Jordan, United States Congresswoman

Simple Things (Jim Brickman, featuring Rebecca Lynn Howard)

http://youtu.be/YcUKvmqUCek

     I have been thinking a lot lately about "simple things". I think this is because of all of the chaos and upheaval I have been experiencing in my personal life these days. Last week I experienced the great pain and chaos (and 5+ hours in E.R.) of having a small kidney stone. Who knew that a 6 mm x 3 mm rock could wreak such havoc? If you have ever had one, I'm sure you can "feel my pain".  It amazes me how much pain and chaos this small stone has caused both in my physical body and in the world around me. It has totally disrupted my life for a week and wreaked havoc on my system. 

   But, if I look at this situation and turn it around and look at the "small and simple things" that bring joy into my life, my perspective changes. Sometime ago I made a "joy list" and saved it on my computer. I have revisited and revised it a little. I am glad I did this exercise so that, at times like these, I can go to it and remind myself that "all is not lost" and "this too shall pass" (pun intended ;-)). I can still have joy, in spite of the pain, if I choose to look at it from a different point of view.

 

My Joy List

1. Beautiful flowers and gardens

2. Beautiful music

3. Beautiful artwork (anything Thomas Kinkade)

4. Good chocolate

5. Time with family

6. Feeling the love of God through the Spirit

7. Helping others to feel the Spirit through learning, teaching and serving

8. Sunshine

9. The cat purring while sitting on my lap 

10. Holding my husband's hand

11. Autumn Leaves on the trees

12. Scented candles

     As much as I am able I am trying to surround myself with these simple things, trying to maintain some sort of balance between the positive and the negative to help me experience some joy in my life right now. 

   I think back to when my children were young, and we had less committments, money and time, yet we seemed to take great delight in the small and simple things of life. We enjoyed going on walks, playing games together, building with blocks, doing puzzles together, playing dolls, snacking on milk and cookies and naps. They were busy days, but simpler times. These seemingly small and simple things were the building blocks of good relationships. They promoted the secure foundation that my children needed in order to someday go out on their own and build their own lives with courage and confidence. As this quote states:

"Enjoy the little things, for one day you may look back and realize they were the big things."  ~Robert Brault

Simple Gifts (Yo Yo Ma and Alison Kraus)

http://youtu.be/fYi9Vr8bHJY

"To Every Thing There is a Season"





“Fall. Stand. Learn. Adapt.”
― Mike Norton, Fighting For Redemption: Hangambiiki

Where Do I Go From Here? (England Dan and John Ford Coley)

http://youtu.be/sDdyA7Ka40Q

    Autumn seems to always make me very introspective and nostalgic. I have recently been re-reading through some of my handwritten journal entries for the past few years. It is interesting to read my thoughts and experiences from this side of them. When I am going through the events I feel like I just have to write to get the feelings out of me and on to the page. As I read them in retrospect, I see attitudes that I have miss-taken and some character weaknesses that need to be revised. That is one of the beauties of keeping a consistent journal, I can learn from my writings and understand where I need to adapt, and what course corrections I need to make along my life path.

    It's comforting and reassuring to know that I can adjust my patterns and thinking, I can change. I don't have to, nor do I want to, repeat the undesirable patterns. There have been times in my life when I have felt a little "lost" and a little unsure of where to go or what to do next. It seems that when I take the time to read through my journals I get a better sense of who I am, where I came from, and what direction I need to go next to become who I want to be. Some of my choices I am not proud of,  and those are the times that I beat myself up a little and feel ashamed; but they are also the times that make me want to change my course and learn from them, correct myself and not repeat the same mistakes.

     Other entries make me feel good about how I handled a particular situation which could have turned out really bad. The writing has kept me on an even keel and let me vent my frustrations and feelings in a "safe place", before I reacted and did something that I know I would have regretted later. I think sometimes we just need "someone" to "talk" to, someone to tell us we aren't "lost". My journal does that for me.

     When I am in a bad place in life it has helped me to reread about a time in my life when I was in a really good place. A time when I felt secure, confident, wise. When I reread what I wrote at those times and I take the time to pause and think about what my wiser self wrote, I am amazed that it came out of me! It motivates me, inspires me to keep going, and to once again try harder to get beyond whatever it is I am struggling with that is keeping me from being my best self.

     To me, life spirals in cycles. I think of our life cycles much like the seasons of the year, and they often correspond. Like the changing of the seasons, we have our time to be introspective. We have our time of  hibernation (or incubation?), to rest, renew, and regroup. We are still living, still growing (sometimes more than we know), even when we appear to be dormant. When the "season shifts" we are then better able to break forth and blossom, baffling the world with our brilliance! (Well, at least we hope so ;-)). "To every thing there is a season, and a time for every purpose under the heaven." (Ecclesiastes 3:1). I guess it's time to bring out the sweaters and turn on the heat....

"In the depths of winter, I finally learned that there was in me an invincible summer."

[Albert Camus]

 

Lost (Michael Buble)

http://youtu.be/LFq3HIEucjs

“When the music changes, so does the dance.” African Proverb



“It's like an emotional dance party: Some dances will be your favorites -- others more awkward or difficult to learn. Some will be boring or make you mad. Some you will wish you never needed to do again. But AHA! You think. I will dance all the dances I can.”
― SARK, Glad No Matter What: Transforming Loss and Change into Gift and Opportunity



Life's A Dance (John Michael Montgomery)
http://youtu.be/7k4ujBGRGf8

     When I was younger I wanted to be a ballet dancer. My mother loved the ballet and would often get season tickets and take my sister and I to see the performances. I thought there was nothing more beautiful than the lovely sight of dancers in their brilliant costumes moving so gracefully across the stage. I was never given the opportunity in my young life to study ballet. I think it was because I was born with club feet which had to be corrected with the aid of casts to reform my feet and legs. I have since found out that I also have a leg length discrepancy, my right leg is slightly longer than my left leg. I was always pretty clumsy as a child, and I fell frequently while running on the playground at school. I think it had a lot to do with the fact that I had different leg lengths and weak ankles. This fact, however, didn't keep me from trying to learn a little in a college class in my 20's, but by then it was too late to seriously pursue the art. I did, however, develop a greater appreciation for the hard work and physical stamina that it takes to be a good ballet dancer.

     I remember the day when I was forced to give up the dream of being a dancer. I was in attendance at a community talent event. One of the local dance schools was putting on a performance with several of the dances the students had learned. They looked so beautiful in their costumes and they executed the moves very skillfully. As I looked on I was suddenly overcome with the realization that it would never be me doing that, in any shape or form. I sat in the theater and quietly wept, tears streaming down my face. I'm sure that anyone who looked at me would have thought that I was crazy. Only I knew why I felt so emotional. Only I knew the truth and the pain of a dreamed never realized.

       Since that day there have been many dreams come and go. Some have involved my family and friends, and some are just for me. I had hoped that one of my daughters might take up dance and live out the dream of being a dancer that I kept hidden. But, alas, none did. They had other dreams of their own to pursue (and still do). I have had to change my dreams to focus on what I can do, rather than what I cannot do anymore. Adjust to what is more realistic for me at this time of my life. I have started some dreams and never finished them - yet anyway. I have come to realize that some may never be completed in this life. It has not been easy to let some of them go, but it has been necessary. Some broken dreams have made me angry. Other dreams fulfilled have brought me great joy beyond my comprehension.

    Isn't that like life in general? It is part of the mortal experience. The good and the bad; the ups and the downs; the highs and the lows. Life truly is a type of dance, and some of us are better able to dance the steps than others. We all have our own unique style and twists that we bring to the steps, and that's what makes the whole performance turn out beautifully. As we each dance our part we don't always see the overall quality of the performance, because we are so focused on our own sequence of steps. We loose sight of the "big picture" and how it will all turn out when every part is performed. Right now I am experiencing a down time in my life. I like this quote by Iveta Cherneva, “When life gets you down, improvise as if crawling was part of the choreography.” And, some days it feels like I am literally crawling to get through the day. (I may literally be doing so after this impending knee surgery is done, time will tell.) Perhaps crawling is a necessary step, maybe even a vital step, in the overall performance, this I do not know.  But in the end I hope I can dance (or crawl) my steps in such a way that when my final performance is through, I have done my part well enough to warrant a standing ovation.

I Hope You Dance (Lee Ann Womack)

http://youtu.be/RV-Z1YwaOiw

The Awakening



King of Anything (Sara Bareilles)
http://youtu.be/RPk4_XfYhjg

The Awakening

(Author Unknown)

"A time comes in your life when you finally get it ....

When, in the midst of all your fears and insanity, you stop dead in your tracks and somewhere the voice inside your head cries out - ENOUGH!

Enough fighting, and crying or struggling to hold on.
And, like a child quieting down after a blind tantrum, your sobs begin to subside, you shudder once or twice, you blink back your tears and begin to look at the world through new eyes.

This is your awakening.

You realize it's time to stop hoping and waiting for something to change...or for happiness, safety and security to come galloping over the next horizon.

You come to terms with the fact that neither of you is Prince Charming or Cinderella and that in the real world there aren't always fairy tail endings (or beginnings for that matter) and that any guarantee of "happily ever after" must begin with you...and in the process a sense of serenity is born of acceptance.

You awaken to the fact that you are not perfect and that not everyone will always love, appreciate or approve of who or what you are...and that's o.k. They are entitled to their own views and opinions. And you learn the importance of loving and championing yourself...and in the process a sense of new found confidence is born of self-approval. You stop complaining and blaming other people for the things they did to you (or didn't do for you) and you learn that the only thing you can really count on is the unexpected.

You learn that people don't always say what they mean or mean what they say and that not everyone will always be there for you and that it's not always about you.

So, you learn to stand on your own and to take care of yourself...

And in the process a sense of safety and security is born of self-reliance. You stop judging and pointing fingers and you begin to accept people as they are and to overlook their shortcomings and human frailties...and in the process a sense of peace and contentment is born of forgiveness. You realize that much of the way you view yourself, and the world around you, is as a result of all the messages and opinions that have been ingrained into your psyche.

And you begin to sift through all the junk you've been fed about how you should behave, how you should look, how much you should weigh, and what you should wear, what you should do for a living, how much money you should make, what you should drive, how and where you should live; who you should marry, the importance of having and raising children, and what you own your parents, family and friends.

You learn to open up to new worlds and different points of view. And you begin reassessing and redefining who you are and what you really stand for. You learn the difference between wanting and needing and you begin to discard the doctrines and values you've outgrown, or should never have bought into to begin with...and in the process you learn to go with your instincts.

You learn that it is truly in giving that we receive. And that there is power and glory in creating and contributing and you stop maneuvering through life merely as a "consumer" looking for your next fix.

You learn that principles such as honesty and integrity are not the outdated ideals of a bygone era but the mortar that holds together the foundation upon which you must build a life. You learn that you don't know everything, it's not your job to save the world and that you can't teach a pig to sing.

You learn to distinguish between guilt and responsibility and the importance of setting boundaries and learning to say NO. You learn that the only cross to bear is the one you choose to carry and that martyrs get burned at the stake.

Then you learn about love. How to love, how much to give in love, when to stop giving and when to walk away. You learn that feelings of entitlement are perfectly o.k....and that it is your right to want things and to ask for the things you want...and that sometimes it is necessary to make demands.

You come to the realization that you deserve to be treated with love, kindness, sensitivity, and respect and you won't settle for less. And you learn that your body really is your temple. And you begin to care for it and treat it with respect. You begin to eat a balanced diet, drink more water, and take more time to exercise.

You learn that being tired fuels doubt, fear and uncertainty and so you take more time to rest. And, just as food fuels the body, laughter fuels our soul. So you take more time to laugh and to play. You learn that, for the most part, you get in life what you believe you deserve...and that much of life truly is a self-fulfilling prophecy.

You learn that anything worth achieving is worth working for and that wishing for something to happen is different than working toward making it happen. More importantly, you learn that in order to achieve success you need direction, discipline and perseverance. You also learn that no one can do it all alone... and that it's OK to risk asking for help.

You learn the only thing you must truly fear is the greatest robber baron of all: FEAR, itself. You learn to step right into and through your fears because you know that whatever happens you can handle it and to give into fear is to give away the right to live life on your own terms. And you learn to fight for your life and not to squander it living under a cloud of impending doom.

You learn that life isn't always fair, you don't always get what you think you deserve and that sometimes bad things happen to unsuspecting, good people. On these occasions you learn not to personalize things. You learn that God isn't punishing you or failing to answer your prayers. It's just life happening. And you learn to deal with evil in it's most primal state - the ego. You learn that negative feelings such as anger, envy and resentment must be understood and redirected or they will suffocate the life out of you and poison the universe that surrounds you.

You learn to admit when you are wrong and to build bridges instead of walls. You learn to be thankful and to take comfort in many of the simple things we take for granted, things that millions of people upon the earth can only dream about: a full refrigerator, clean running water, a soft warm bed, a long hot shower.

Slowly, you begin to take responsibility for yourself by yourself and you make yourself a promise to never betray yourself and to never, ever settle for less than your heart's desire.

And you hang a wind chime outside your window so you can listen to the wind. And you make it a point to keep smiling, to keep trusting, and to stay open to every wonderful possibility.

Finally, with courage in your heart and God by your side you take a stand, you take a deep breath, and you begin to design the life you want to live as best you can."