"Growth takes time. When we nurture ourselves in healthy and respectful ways, we blossom and shine.
So be patient with yourself.
Everything is unfolding in the perfect way and in the perfect time."
Let Him In (Michaela McLean)
http://youtu.be/C3f6SXPYDAU
I have been struggling with some health challenges the past two weeks. They have taken their toll on my emotional and mental health, as well as my physical health. I have had to realize that I need to slow down in my "growth" process, which for me means having to cancel a class that I had planned to take next semester and take some time off to regain my health. I am not the most patient person, and I often I push myself and think I can and should do more than I really need to. In my stubbornness and over exhuberance I have, once again, "hit the wall - crashed and burned". So, this has been a double whammy for me. Perhaps that is the lesson I am being asked to learn right now (again). The above quote about says it all. Growth does take time and we need to be patient with ourselves, especially when things don't go according to our plans.
It hit me today that perhaps this lesson is coming now for another reason as well. I have been struggling with some depression about the Christmas holiday this year. For various reasons, my health condition among them, my expectations for the Christmas season will not be met. I think that this might be God's way of telling me that I need to slow down and take a look at what is really important right now. Stop, and take a look at what is the true meaning of Christmas. It isn't about all of the gifts that I feel I need to buy, wrap and send by a certain deadline. It isn't in the Christmas goodies that I won't be baking this year. It's not in all of the parties and the get togethers I won't be attending. Although this is all fun, it isn't really necessary to celebrate the simple birth of my Lord and Savior, Jesus Christ.
I think that God is telling me I need to slow it down. I need to focus on the whole "reason for the season". I need to simplify and take the time I need to "nurture (myself) in healthy and respectful ways", in order that I can "blossom and shine". There is a reason that most animals go into hybernation for the winter. Every living thing needs some "down time" to rest and regroup, and I think that this is my time to do just that. For months (years?) I have been thinking, "if I can just get through this next ___________ (activity, test, chapter, event, whatever...), then I can take a rest". Reality is that this has been my wake up call that that isn't likely to happen any time soon unless I choose to make it happen. Sometimes I forget that just like any other living and breathing thing, growth takes time and sometimes some rest. The more I try to force it, the harder and slower it becomes. So, once again, I am being told the message that I keep getting over and over again - "trust in and wait on the Lord" and "So be patient with yourself. Everything is unfolding in the perfect way and in the perfect time."
In the meantime, and especially during this precious and most holy time of year, take time to let the true meaning of Christmas, the whole reason for the season, into your heart, mind and life. Don't fight it. Slow down, savor it, enjoy it, bask in it, let it come over you. I really don't want to miss "my chance to share in their joy". "Nurture ourselves in healthy and respectful ways", heal your wounded body and soul. Then, when the time is right, you will have the strength to heal and try again. So for now:
"Let Him In, let him in
Let the joy and hope begin.
Let him in, let him in
let the peace on earth begin.
And whether it be in your world today,
or a crowded Bethlehem inn.
Find a way,
make Him room,
let him in."
Thanks for the reminder!
Do You Have Room? (Shawna Edwards)
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