No Such Thing (John Mayer)
http://youtu.be/DdmcxrQLKaM
I'm "borrowing" this one from life coach, Cheryl Richardson. It contains so much wisdom and says it so much better than I can (especially right now - sniff).
"I've guided artists, entrepreneurs, corporate employees, or
moms and dads through the process of identifying their goals and crafting
an action plan, and then I've held them accountable for taking the actions
that will improve the quality of their lives. I've learned a lot about
what makes for a great life - a life that honors who we really are; our
values and most treasured priorities. And I've learned about what gets in
the way.
moms and dads through the process of identifying their goals and crafting
an action plan, and then I've held them accountable for taking the actions
that will improve the quality of their lives. I've learned a lot about
what makes for a great life - a life that honors who we really are; our
values and most treasured priorities. And I've learned about what gets in
the way.
Today I'd like to share a list of ten things my clients tell me they wish
they had known earlier in life (me too!). As difficult as it is to listen
to adults, trust me, if you take even one piece of advice from this list
and use it, you've got a much better chance of leading a full and happy
life.
they had known earlier in life (me too!). As difficult as it is to listen
to adults, trust me, if you take even one piece of advice from this list
and use it, you've got a much better chance of leading a full and happy
life.
1.Relax. Nowadays there's too much pressure put on kids to make the
"perfect" career choice. You're still young. Give yourself plenty of
time to chart your own course. After all, current studies show that
adults will change careers (not jobs!) 5 to 7 times in a lifetime. We all
have multiple gifts and talents that need to be honored and expressed.
The choices you make today will grow and evolve over time, so don't worry.
Think of your career as a long-term portfolio of jobs that will express
the fullness of who you are. There are no perfect choices.
"perfect" career choice. You're still young. Give yourself plenty of
time to chart your own course. After all, current studies show that
adults will change careers (not jobs!) 5 to 7 times in a lifetime. We all
have multiple gifts and talents that need to be honored and expressed.
The choices you make today will grow and evolve over time, so don't worry.
Think of your career as a long-term portfolio of jobs that will express
the fullness of who you are. There are no perfect choices.
2. Spend more time on the who than the what. What you do will always be
less important than who you become. Knowledge is great but it will never
take you as far as your courage, your integrity, your reputation for
someone who keeps his or her word, or your commitment to be of service to
others in some important way. As you go through life, get in the habit of
asking yourself "how can I grow from this experience?"
less important than who you become. Knowledge is great but it will never
take you as far as your courage, your integrity, your reputation for
someone who keeps his or her word, or your commitment to be of service to
others in some important way. As you go through life, get in the habit of
asking yourself "how can I grow from this experience?"
3. Follow your heart. Stop worrying so much about what everyone else
thinks. The most important relationship you'll ever have is with you.
When I think about all of the regrets I've heard from adults over the
years, the biggest one always has to do with listening to everyone else
but themselves. Start early. Make your own rules and follow them. At the
end of your life, the only person you'll have to answer to is you.
thinks. The most important relationship you'll ever have is with you.
When I think about all of the regrets I've heard from adults over the
years, the biggest one always has to do with listening to everyone else
but themselves. Start early. Make your own rules and follow them. At the
end of your life, the only person you'll have to answer to is you.
4. Develop your "maverick muscle." Be willing to bend the rules, learn how
to disappoint others gracefully, get comfortable with people not liking
you, and always strive to be an original thinker. I have a little sign in
my office that says: No Guts, No Glory and I use it to remind me to go
against the grain as much as possible.
to disappoint others gracefully, get comfortable with people not liking
you, and always strive to be an original thinker. I have a little sign in
my office that says: No Guts, No Glory and I use it to remind me to go
against the grain as much as possible.
For those of you who like John Mayer, install this verse in your head.
It's from his song "No Such Thing":
It's from his song "No Such Thing":
They love to tell you
Stay inside the lines
But something's better
On the other side
Stay inside the lines
But something's better
On the other side
5. Be practical. The skills that will carry you the furthest through life
are your ability to communicate with others both in speaking and writing.
Commit to becoming an excellent communicator and success is yours for the
taking. Also, think about the practical courses you might need later on.
I can assure you that some of the courses you've already taken - the ones
that you're sure you'll never need - will come in handy.
are your ability to communicate with others both in speaking and writing.
Commit to becoming an excellent communicator and success is yours for the
taking. Also, think about the practical courses you might need later on.
I can assure you that some of the courses you've already taken - the ones
that you're sure you'll never need - will come in handy.
6. Build your courage muscles. Starting tomorrow, practice doing one
small thing a day that frightens you. Learn to water ski or finally ask
that guy or girl you've been eyeing to have dinner. Small acts of courage
strengthen your ability to take even bigger leaps later on like deciding
to write your own book or backpack through Europe. If you really want to
build your courage muscles, take a public speaking course. It will not
only contribute to the last piece of advice (becoming an excellent
communicator), it's one of the fastest ways I know to build confidence and
self esteem. Confident people rarely settle for less!
small thing a day that frightens you. Learn to water ski or finally ask
that guy or girl you've been eyeing to have dinner. Small acts of courage
strengthen your ability to take even bigger leaps later on like deciding
to write your own book or backpack through Europe. If you really want to
build your courage muscles, take a public speaking course. It will not
only contribute to the last piece of advice (becoming an excellent
communicator), it's one of the fastest ways I know to build confidence and
self esteem. Confident people rarely settle for less!
7. Don't go to the hardware store for milk. When you're excited about
doing something or trying to make an important decision, make sure you
turn to those people who will encourage you to take a chance - the ones
who believe in you rather than those who will tell you why something won't
work. Surround yourself with positive people - the kind of people who
challenge you to reach beyond your fear rather than play it safe. There
will always be people telling you why an idea is risky, or why you can't
do something. That advice is usually based on the mistakes they've made
or the chances they didn't because they were afraid. But, always remember
this: someone else's past doesn't equal your future. When faced with a
naysayer, smile, say thank you, and turn around. Stick with positive
people who believe in you. Remember, if you needed milk, you wouldn't go
to the hardware store. And by the way, you're mom was right. You do
become who you hang around with. Choose wisely.
doing something or trying to make an important decision, make sure you
turn to those people who will encourage you to take a chance - the ones
who believe in you rather than those who will tell you why something won't
work. Surround yourself with positive people - the kind of people who
challenge you to reach beyond your fear rather than play it safe. There
will always be people telling you why an idea is risky, or why you can't
do something. That advice is usually based on the mistakes they've made
or the chances they didn't because they were afraid. But, always remember
this: someone else's past doesn't equal your future. When faced with a
naysayer, smile, say thank you, and turn around. Stick with positive
people who believe in you. Remember, if you needed milk, you wouldn't go
to the hardware store. And by the way, you're mom was right. You do
become who you hang around with. Choose wisely.
8. Live by this mantra: where there's a will, there's a way. Don't give
up when things get hard.
up when things get hard.
9. Keep your body sacred - it's the only vehicle you have to carry you
on this journey called life. If you smoke, quit. If you don't, never
start. Limit your alcohol consumption. Aside from the physical and
practical dangers of drinking too much, one of the greatest detriments is
that alcohol numbs you just enough to make it easier to live a mediocre
life. You deserve better than that.
on this journey called life. If you smoke, quit. If you don't, never
start. Limit your alcohol consumption. Aside from the physical and
practical dangers of drinking too much, one of the greatest detriments is
that alcohol numbs you just enough to make it easier to live a mediocre
life. You deserve better than that.
10. Stay connected. Your connection to technology, email and instant
messaging, will never replace your connection with those you love. Every
now and then pick up the phone and call a friend, or visit a loved one
rather than send an email or an instant message. Too often I've seen
technology draw a wedge between people. Always remember that it's who we
love and who loves us that matters most at the end of our lives.
messaging, will never replace your connection with those you love. Every
now and then pick up the phone and call a friend, or visit a loved one
rather than send an email or an instant message. Too often I've seen
technology draw a wedge between people. Always remember that it's who we
love and who loves us that matters most at the end of our lives.
Finally, at the time you were born you were given an amazing gift - a gift
that most of us forget about as we grow older. It's the power to design
your own unique life. You are an artist. The canvas is your life. From
this moment on, take ownership of this gift and use it wisely. If you do,
your life will become an extraordinary work of art.
that most of us forget about as we grow older. It's the power to design
your own unique life. You are an artist. The canvas is your life. From
this moment on, take ownership of this gift and use it wisely. If you do,
your life will become an extraordinary work of art.
Thanks, Cheryl! Congratulations to the class of 2012 (including my own daughter, Michaela)! Well done!
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